There is a fundamental force that constantly impels time and space to reshape itself and alter the path that I take in my life. This force, I am certain, has always been there long before I was born, will continue to be there long after I die, and it is common to us all. I can feel it when I am singing, dancing laughing, or even dying (note to self: you haven’t died yet, but there is a strong conviction in you that there is no difference between dying, singing, laughing, and crying. They are all dance gestures that are propelled by the same force).
This intelligent, highly creative force, invariably forms a fertile web of interactions, rhythms, modulations, preludes, epilogues, crescendos, diminuendos, accentuations, even momentary pauses, and these interactions are beyond choice. Even though it may seem to me that I am a product of my own choices, but yesterday I was moving in one direction and today, I seem to be impelled to move in another. Choice, it seems to me, is an illusion; a form of a belief system that is a fabrication in my own mind. The moments that make up my life, like a group of quickly fading trajectories, only become clear to me moment to moment.
I only follow energetic patterns and move amidst these patters, just like a pianist’s interweaving fingers move through a four part fugue; without control and without choice. (another note to self: still doubting about whether we make a choice or not, I ask myself, -If the pianist makes a choice to play a note, does the note make a choice to play the pianist’s finger, or it is all a choice-less interaction between finger and note?
I think it becomes clear to me (moment to moment) that life is a choice-less interaction and this interactions suggest a new potential direction every time.
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